Tag Archives: regulations

The Cowboys Are Strict Parents

27 Aug

Dallas Cowboys receiver Dez Bryant is going to be under lock and key. Bryant was arrested back in July for a Class A misdemeanor for assaulting his mother. Apparently there was an argument and he pushed her. She didn’t not need to go to the hospital but the police were still called. Although this was Bryant’s first arrest he previous had an altercation in a nightclub in Miami and was also banned from a mall for bad language and sagging pants. The Cowboys are taking no chances on him getting into the trouble again.

The 23-year old will be adhering to some new rules. Here is what he must do:

1. Attend weekly counseling sessions.

2. Have a full-time security detail. They will be with him all the time: practices, games, lunch with his grandma.

3. Cannot consume alcohol or go to strip clubs.

4. He has a 12am curfew every night.

So basically Bryant is like a 15-year old kid. But on the bright side at least the Cowboys care enough to give him rules. When Chad Johnson hit his wife the Miami Dolphins just sent him packing. And he does get a much bigger salary than the average teenager with a contract of $1.34 million yearly.

-M

 

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Who Needs Education?

6 Apr

After proving he couldn’t hack it in the academic world Syracuse sophomore Fab Melo has decided to enter the NBA. As many of you remember Melo screwed with your bracket after being banned from the NCAA Tournament over cheating on a test academic issues. It was the second time this season Melo had missed games based on academics. So I guess it was an obvious decision of his to enter the NBA. Melo’s stats are less than stellar for a 7 foot center he averages 7.8 points and 5.8 rebounds. What Melo does have is good blocking skills. He is a player that would have benefited from another year of college ball.

On another education related note the University of Connecticut was denied their appeal to waive academic requirements to allow them to play in the NCAA Tournament next year. I guess the NCAA is really putting their money where their mouths are on this whole smart jock campaign. UConn is lobbying to let them submit newer scores (averages of all team players) that show that their athletes have improved or that they have recruited very smart bench warmers. I finally understand that awkward short white kid you see on the bench that never plays . . . he does have purpose! Maybe the NCAA just wants to cram as much knowledge as possible in before these kids turn pro. How much can you learn in a year?